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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24256693">Not a time to celebrate</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Daily_Scenarios/pseuds/Daily_Scenarios'>Daily_Scenarios</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Emmerdale</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Canon Compliant, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Robert's birthday</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 22:09:06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>722</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24256693</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Daily_Scenarios/pseuds/Daily_Scenarios</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Robert’s birthday came and went and since we won’t get this on screen, I wrote something. A bit sad. Definitely not my usual style, but it fits. I think.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Aaron Dingle/Robert Sugden</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>41</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Not a time to celebrate</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Aaron was alone. It was rare. Nowadays when he came home from work Cain was always there... or better yet he and Billy and that Will were. He still didn’t like it, but he had no energy to deal with Cain’s mess. Certainly not right now. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>It was hard to wake up today. He thought maybe he could block it out, he could pretend... that it’s just like any other day. He arranged a scrap run so he wouldn’t have to sit in the cabin all day because staying at home wasn’t an option.  But he finished with work now, got nothing else to do, so he got home, hoping he wouldn’t feel this emptiness inside his chest. Robert’s stuff might have gone, but the place still held memories. Chill ran down his spine as he thought about last year. Only a year ago, he was so happy, and he thought that this year he could make this day even more special. No surprises, no parties, and definitely no interruptions. Robert’s birthday was worth the effort. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>It would’ve been worth the effort. He sighed as he sank further down the sofa slowly closing his eyes, trying to hold back the tears. He promised himself he wouldn’t cry. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Selfish bastard.” - he sniffed. He couldn’t help but imagine what would today be like with Robert being there. He would’ve woken him up slowly, by kissing down his back. He’d have heard Robert’s low groan, meaning he was awake, fully knowing what Aaron has been up to. He would’ve said he didn’t like the fuss, but he wouldn’t have pushed him away if Aaron leaned over him, kissing him without mercy. He would’ve tried to bake a cake at the crack of dawn, just so Robert could laugh at him, telling him he’s hopeless before they would decide on pancakes. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>They would’ve waited for Liv to go to college before properly locking up, agreeing not to open the door to anyone. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Aaron would’ve convinced him to ditch work for the whole day, no matter how many times his phone would’ve rung.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He would’ve let Robert open a bottle of champagne for no good reason, and he’d smile when he wouldn’t use glasses. <em>“I don’t fancy cleaning up Aaron, straight from the bottle will be just fine”. </em>Aaron swore he heard a voice in his head... Robert’s voice, saying the words. He shook his head slightly. It’s not like it would come true. It could never come true. Robert was miles away. He wanted nothing to do with him. And he was still here, mourning the loss like he was dead. He wasn’t, but it’s sure as hell felt like it. Even after all these months. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Later on, when he couldn’t bear the silence anymore, he went to the pub. He didn’t think just asked for a glass of champagne. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Champagne?” - asked Vic. She was filling in for Chas, and Aaron was relieved that he didn’t have to talk to his mother. He wasn’t in the mood. Aaron knew that Vic remembered the date, but he didn’t want to talk about it.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Can you... can you just serve me without questions? I really don’t have it in me tonight.” - he said to her, and Vic only nodded. She gave him the glass and watched Aaron sitting in the corner booth. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Is that Aaron?” - asked Chas a few minutes later coming back from the backroom.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yeah but... just let him be tonight.” - said Vic trying to be sympathetic. Chas gave her a puzzled look, not following entirely. - “It’s Robert’s birthday.” - she added quietly.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I should...” - she started already on her way over there. Aaron was busy staring into his glass to notice any of this. Maybe it was for the best. Vic gently pushed Chas back, shaking her head.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Just not today. He needs space. You know it won’t help if you push him.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“But...”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“He’s gonna be alright. Just not tonight. Just let him be tonight Chas.” - she said walking away. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Chas looked at her son for a second, sitting there, hovering over the almost empty glass. She didn’t want him to feel uncomfortable, but it didn’t look like Aaron even acknowledged anybody in the room. He gulped down the last drop, then without saying a word, he stood up and walked out of the pub. </p>
<p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I promised I would write something, but I waited just in case we have a mention somewhere...well the wait is over. </p>
<p>hope you'll enjoy it</p></blockquote></div></div>
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